Noah’s Ark

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I am not a religious person, but according to my mom (who studies the bible like the back of her hand) it rained for 40 days and 40 nights when the entire world flooded and the only survivors were the two chosen ones, of each species, that made it on to the famous ark.

According to my calculations we are about half way there, and if you haven’t already starting building your boat – it’s crunch time.

If you live anywhere similar to my house, you have been under water for some time now. There are ponds, deep enough to habitat sharks, where there used to be flowerbeds and endless fields of grass.

Consequently, there is also mud, mud that could be mistaken for that quick sand that you were always warned about as a small child. In fact, every time you step foot outside your front door you risk loosing your rubber boot to the under world, because once it’s gone it is so far gone into the earths greedy, muddy hands.

However, if I had of wrote this blog post a few days ago those living in paved subdivisions might be laughing at the misfortune of the rural land owners, except for the fact that now this never ending rain is pooling up on pavement and sidewalks and no one can escape the rushing water that is undoubtedly taking over earth.

At this point the old saying “it’s a great day to be a duck” doesn’t even apply, because I am convinced that not even the ducks are enjoying this weather anymore. I have two theories on this:

  • One is that the rain has drowned all the worms and that worm soup is only delicious for a few days
  • And the second is the fact that even animals that love being wet can only love it in comparison to being dry: and that has not been an option in the last two weeks

The worst part is the rain doesn’t seem to be letting up anytime soon, except maybe on Sunday when Canadian’s get one last taste of winter with the snow that is on the horizon.

So pick your poison right? In my right hand I hold the end of the world by intense flooding, and in my left the end by a modern day ice age.

But, right now as I dry my hair for the 3rd time today and strip off my soaking wet clothes AGAIN I can’t help but notice that the constant sound of water on my roof is matching my miserable tears that are a result of this awful weather.

And to anyone reading this I can only wish two things for you: that your arks are ready in time and that I see you on the other side where the sun is hopefully shinning and the mud is just a distant memory.

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